Author Topic: She Was a Vision by ZTV25  (Read 3194 times)

Offline Gromet

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She Was a Vision by ZTV25
« on: October 02, 2016, 06:25:58 am »
You can view the story here on the plaza:
F/m; frat party; amazon; capture; breasts; enclosed; stuck; encased; bond; bfold; tease; oral; sex; climax; femdom; cons; X

Please feel free to leave your kind comments & feedback here about this story.

Thanks  ;)

Offline loras pa6

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Re: She Was a Vision by ZTV25
« Reply #1 on: October 03, 2016, 04:21:31 am »
I want to start off by saying I did enjoy the story...
but I want to offer some constructive criticism to you ZTV25

First your description of Nali being:"Tall – between six or seven foot at least" A one foot height tolerance is extreme when describing a person.
If you look at the attached file the images represent the three main characters of my Slaviversary stories, the pink one is 6'-1 1/2", the blue 5'-4", and the yellow 5'-6". I created this so I could realistically describe my character physical interactions

As you can see there is a drastic height difference between the pink figure and the other two is already substantial at just over a half foot

Now you never really mention Taylor's true height, but without a considerable suspension of believe he'd need to be the size of a garden gnome to truly be trapped between her breasts and hidden under tight clothing, even considering Nali being 7' tall. If this were a Shrinking Man or Giantess story I could set aside this with the expectations of those genres relying on Mystical or Technological element to cause a size change.  But since it was rooted in 'real' world it stands out to me.

You have good potential, and I liked the characters' other interactions. I hope to see more from you


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