Author Topic: Indecent Proposal by Jackie Rabbit  (Read 23286 times)

Offline feline

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Re: Indecent Proposal by Jackie Rabbit
« Reply #30 on: July 01, 2022, 06:06:55 pm »
Still catching up with myself, which seems to be a regular state of affairs :)

I have just finished going back and re-reading, and enjoying, part 6, to get myself back up to speed on where we were.  So many questions left hanging, so many hints, the feeling of such wicked plots in action...  so lets see what you have for us!

Well, the bedtie story code, along with its friends, is a good start *evil smirk*

Lovely imagery.  Since Jack is still coming to grips with the idea and the concept of taking charge of you, I do wonder how much of this comfort and relaxation is due to external encouragement, and how much is coming naturally from within, due to this rather bizarre situation.  Perhaps we will find out with time :)

Lies, surely this is lies!  What more could there be to marriage than great sex?!  Strange ideas...  next you will want connection, communication, trust, to share your deepest thoughts and fantasies with someone...  nope, doesn't sound anything like how marriage is supposed to work *raspberry*  At the same time, it's a little sad to think that there is something so important to Jackie that has somehow not been reached or touched in her marriage, especially since from memory she seemed so very happy with Mike.

Ah, yes, Jack has been given the tools for his fantasy life, but he is also trying to live his real life like a gentleman...  talk about a different take on rock and a hard place!

Given the rather clear hints that Tammy has dropped, and the hints of other plans in action, I don't for a second thing that Tammy believes you are a well paid, or even massively well paid, actor!  Although, it does seem that all sorts of things are available for enough money *shrug*

Waiting to catch you out is a very logical fear, a very reasonable expectation, but it simply doesn't fit with the pattern so far established.  Not that this tells me much about what she is actually up to, but that really doesn't fit or make sense.  She is after something much bigger, she has to be, but what?!

Yes, fucking and love making are very different things, but you have rather bluntly asked for the 3rd option, to be taken, dominated and used...  I would argue something quite different than the first two, but perhaps every bit as powerful, in its own way, as love making...  As for you being confused, well, you never asked to be placed into this situation, that is worth remembering, and you have made Jack work for it, at least a bit.

Interesting comments about Mike dressing you down, although I am tempted to ask if he was trying to keep you all to himself, rather than hiding what you have.  But if so, you are clearly not thinking in those terms, so if that was his plan he never shared it clearly.

Why or how would one know if human anatomy was defective?  There can be very subtle, but effective, defects, that you would never see, but that would be totally effective.

Well its hardly a surprise that your mind is running around, trying to make sense of everything and grasping at all sorts of random thoughts.  There are plenty of things going on here that are being kept from you, and you are in the middle of things, and clearly intelligent and interested enough to want to know what the hell is happening :)

Well, once there is one big important secret, it is only fair to wonder if there are more...  and yes, the rings alone seem a thin reason to so change his approach to how you dress, and to send you off like this.  Perhaps Jack's explanation, when it finally appears, will explain some of this?

That's a dark and nasty thought, that Mike wanted someone else and was using this as a method to pass you on, but the first response is to point out that all of this came from Tammy, and Jack's office, nothing to do with Mike at all.  Yes, perhaps he ceased a change in a million, but it seems most unlikely.  But then again, the whole situation is hardly "normal" or "reasonable".

No phone contact and all these questions, and I cannot even say trust your husband, since there are to many secrets on the loose.  You need a good distraction, that would "help" *evil smirk*

Way to put Jack on the spot, and I have to admit, his reaction to what Mike is doing doesn't inspire confidence.  What lies has he told...  good question.  The holiday may not be only for two weeks?  Well, if he didn't know, I can certainly forgive that, he was already asking enough and pushing enough, and this is something quite outside of his own control.

*snort* tuna fish casserole?!  *giggles* nice way to lighten the mood, and I have to forgive this one as well.  Am I being to soft on him?  Two forgivings in a row?!

OK, now THAT is sweet, lovely, romantic and goooee!!!  GO JAKE!!!!  Yes, she should definitely dress to show off more *evil plotting*

Now if only you had a nice private hotel room where Jack could be properly rewarded for these special moments...  of course, the impulse may well not survive that long, plus you don't want to be the one taking the initiative here on this front...  yep, a rather serious dilemma!

*giggles* at the fantasy of being arrested, and how far she wanted to take the fantasy, especially the fact that if it ever were to happen she wouldn't be in a position to stop it...  maybe I do have a dirty mind after all ;)

*rolls eyes* or we just note and accept that authority figures and uniforms are common points of fantasy and sexual interest :)

Interesting that Jack seems to have this idea of you as such a good girl, but remember, you have been dressed and presented as SO very modest and "good girl" for quite a while now by your husband, so this idea doesn't exactly exist in isolation, now does it?  Plus, I suspect / know you have been keeping a lot of this side of you hidden from him, since its not how a polite married woman behaves with a man who isn't her husband.

*nods* where the hell did "might have to give you back" come from?  As I understand it, giving her back, virtually untouched in fact, was always the official story here...  apparently there is a hell of a lot more going on here!

OK, so Jack is keeping his word...  which also seems to mean keeping secrets for now.  Yes, he is "manning up" and "taking charge", but as noted, very much not in the desired manor.  What the hell is going on here?!

Taking charge can take a myriad of forms, and it seems Jack has to start small with being in charge of you.  At the same time, him taking charge, even in such a small way, is a nice distraction from this very confused mess of thoughts and feelings here!  So I would say relax and enjoy it, you are here now and part of all of this, after all :)

*SNORT* no, you don't have a deep and complex need for sexual approval, you have been "sent off" with another man, to play the sex toy, after your husband has been hiding you away.  Lots of perfectly obvious and shallow reasons to want and need sexual approval, and you clearly deserve it!

I am quite torn here.  Jack is doing the RIGHT thing by being such a careful gentleman, but at the same time it is quite the wrong thing, since it goes directly against the clear instructions he has been given by Jackie, and this is the wrong thing for Jackie...  but it is still the *right* thing in so many ways...  oh this is all so complex!  Can he just not get women?  Stupid question, I know, but it had to be asked.

Nods, how the hell come Mike never discussed all of this with Jackie?!  No wonder Jack is feeling deeply adrift, surely he never thought that Mike would not clearly discuss things, especially since Mike seemed more than happy to dress and present his wife as sex on legs?!  Random massive urge to slap Mike round the head with a large piece of wood...

So asking if Jack wants happy wife or bitch is a good way to move things forward :)  I approve, and a bit of humour seems rather called for here to!

So you have been taught to respond well to positive signals from your husband, that just speaks to good times between the two of you.  As for Jack and the massively mixed signals, well, learning that Mike never actually talked to you about any of this... I bet a WHOLE lot of confusion has just been resolved, since you have been dumped here without any bloody idea of what your husband things, or what is really going on...  you need help and guidance after all as well!

OK, so yes, Jack isn't a taker, but I think right now a giver is rather more of what you need from the man in your bed with you.

OOoooh, a note, so not saying a word, thrusting the keys into his hand...  well, we are at the point where someone needs to make things clearer, and given the revelation both that there is a secret Jack is keeping, and that Mike avoided discussing anything, it is left to you to push things forward, if they are to move forward...

*nods* selfless and giving, yes, very good words for the Jack we are seeing.  There is still a lot going on we don't understand, but he really is trying so hard to be a gentleman, that gets him a lot of credit in my world, even if it isn't selling the tale he told about his "marriage" and "wife/slut".

Now that is interesting, are you asking if you are not worth proper cuffs from Mike?  If so, then thats actually a remarkably good question...  but how long has what ever is going on in the background, between Mike and Jack, about you, been going on, and does that factor into all of this?

You know, I am starting to detect a theme with your fantasies here... *smirk*

Ouch...  oh bloody hell!  Gentle and loving kisses, how can that be wrong, but given the fantasy, and just possibly what the note says, it really is the wrong response.  I REALLY hope the note is bloody clear and explicit, Jack needs to be told quite clearly what page you want him on!

So many thoughts and questions rolling through your head... but yes, the blindfold is making it worse, you don't have the feedback or the clues as to what Jack is thinking, and until Jack reaches the note I really don't have any hope of him reaching the right page any time soon, if at all...

OK, we can debate the line between topping from the bottom and trying to show him what you want, but at this point REALLY clear communication about what you want has to happen, and YOU need to be "in charge" of making it happen.  Hopefully afterwards he can start being in charge as desired.

Yes, you want to be taken, you want him to be in charge, but at the same time, it seems he is finally starting to accept that you are his for the taking, and he is taking you the way HE wants...  so maybe there is hope for this yet?  Plus this slow, loving exploration, while driving you mad, is really HOT!

Well, a strong interest in your arse, in various ways, is certainly understandable, and perhaps he is just trying to work out what you really want?  We still don't have any sense of how much Mark has shared about your private life after all...  and Jack's interests and desires are very much unknowns...  but the way the topic has so often been avoided by both of them...  well it makes me wonder, especially with all the oddness here.

The ending...  yes, actually that really does feel just right!  So much frustration, so many unknowns, so many secrets, being pushed and pulled in so many ways, it really is time for Jackie to let go and try to finally get Jack on the right page.  There should be such a thing as a gentleman dominant after all!

So much pleasure reading this, such wonderful characters, but also SO MANY bloody questions and unknowns!!!  Someone is very nearly in trouble here...  and I hope you know who you are!

Online jackierabbit1

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Re: Indecent Proposal by Jackie Rabbit
« Reply #31 on: July 03, 2022, 10:24:32 am »
First off, thank you as always for such thoughtful feedback, I love that you appreciate these characters and their unique flaws. Everybody here, (except maybe Mike), wants something from another, their nice enough characters, but everybody has their own motivations here, and I plan on explaining/revealing those next. Maybe Mike thinks he's in over his head with Jackie, maybe he had hopes that she'd calm down a little after almost a year of marriage, (once he put a ring on it) maybe he even thought she'd give up on the baby thing, tone the hunger for kink down a bit? Maybe he's a good guy here too, maybe he just can't talk about things, put his thoughts to words, pretty much like a lot of guys, especially younger ones?

Tammy maybe wants a lever to move her rising star Jack, and that isn't turning out like she thought it would when she concocted this second honeymoon scheme. So now she has to determine what's really going on here, because what IS going on is just too crazy to be true, as in there has to be another more logical explanation. Jack is just too dependable to throw it all away for a woman who isn't even his! Tammy is rooting for Jack, she's already talked him up to the top floor people, (this "won" vacation is the final job interview) and for him to betray her and the company like this will make all of them look bad, so Tammy is searching for some way out of this apparent mess, if her fears and her odd husband's explanation of Jackie's motivations are accurate. Psychology isn't an exact science though; people can deeply believe what simply isn't true, or so it goes on some of those crime shows that I don't really follow.

Jack lusts for what his best friend has, but takes for granted, although he's kept this a deep secret... somehow! There was also a drunken offer tied to the loan for the rings, that if Mike couldn't give her what she wants "someday," Jack would, and this has been bumped up schedule wise by Tammy's intervention. A position will be coming up soon at the company, along with a relocation, but the salary offer will make this an impossible opportunity to walk away from. It will require relocation for the newlyweds, but also enough money that the new family can start making babies together, with her staying home to raise them. It's also an economic trap for Jack, with an ever-growing family at home dependent on him he won't be able to easily leave their employ. And, removed from their family support tree there will be no grandmothers to watch the little ones so that Jackie can chase her so-so career again, to supplement their family income.

Tammy is like a chess grand master, but Jack's deception has scuttled her well laid plans. She can't really retaliate against Jack without compromising herself, career wise, so Jackie is the next logical target, control Jackie, control Jack. She already has the power of suggestion over Jackie, but none of us know how far that extends.

Anyway, I think Jack and Jackie have to have a nice long post coital conversation about the future, maybe Jack thought he could somehow just be a sperm doner and then press on with his own life, but once spending some serious alone time with Jackie he's decided that the gloves come off and he's keeping Jackie, best friend or not. "If you foolishly leave the keys in your sexy almost new sportscar right out in the driveway buddy, you can't really complain when somebody steals it away from you, even if it's a friend." Maybe the thing Jack is waiting for is actually knocking Jackie up, and once that happens all kinds of things change in both men's and women's minds. I've seen this firsthand, men get very possessive and protective, and we get very pragmatic, nesting I've heard it called.

I think the two lovebirds are going to be compelled to "renew" their vows less that one calendar year into their marriage, on their actual anniversary date but earlier in the day, technically annulling Jackie's first marriage to Mike at the last possible moment, or so the legal arguments will go. I am unsure if I want Jackie to live out her fantasy of getting arrested by the sexy female beach cop, it's something I've always fantasized about myself, but super unlikely to happen in the real world. Could this be something, story wise, that Tammy arranges, both to get a little payback for Jackie perpetuating this lie with her, and to have her in the proper place at the proper time for the second ceremony?

I'm curious what you think of the direction of the story, and I as well wanted you to know that there is an ending close at hand, thank you again, Jackie
 

Offline feline

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Re: Indecent Proposal by Jackie Rabbit
« Reply #32 on: August 01, 2022, 03:15:12 pm »
It is the complex characters that so draw me into all of this, that make all of this so interesting and fun!

It does actually make sense that Mike is in over his head.  There wasn't an overt sense of that up front, but seeing the comment, looking at it that way, it makes a great deal of sense.  After all, if he assumes that things are going to go one way once they get together, but instead they start to go a different way, then he can find that a situation that he thought he would be fine with turned into one that he just could not handle at all well.

To be fair to Tammy, who would have thought the situation would be anything like this?  There is looking for some leverage, to get Jack positioned how she wants, and to make sure that his family life will work well with his work life, and then there is stepping into a total mess...  Tammy really doesn't come across as someone who is going to back down or be distracted from her goal in all of this...  so a compliant Jackie makes things "easier", at least in theory, since she has some more control over one of the key pieces on the board.

My first and immediate reaction is that Jackie should absolutely be arrested by the sexy female beach cop, because it would be hot, and also because it adds a very solid, very immediate and "primal" - in the "go protect your mate" sense - lever to work on Jack with.  More than this though, it provides a way of getting hold of any documents, passports, etc, that Jack and Jackie brought with them, in case there is anything there to help make sense of this confusing, and obviously not what she is told it really is situation.

The nesting instinct, I had not really considered this, but actually yes, this would make a lot of sense, and I can see how this would suddenly start to provide enough pressure for things to settle into a new shape, and to stay there!

I am really glad there is a goal, a target in all of this, I am just not sure I like the idea of an ending close at hand, since I am really enjoying the journey, and it feels that there is still quite a lot to sort through, make sense of and resolve!

Online jackierabbit1

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Re: Indecent Proposal by Jackie Rabbit
« Reply #33 on: August 03, 2022, 10:13:38 am »
I'm ever mindful of all the projects that I have running concurrently, and I sometimes feel guilty that I don't spend more time focused on just one or two of them to be honest. It's just the way my mind works though, if I can't find inspiration for one story line, I jump to another. It's probably slightly maddening for one who reads and follows these, especially if their personality drifts towards the "I want it all in one bite" attitude. It can take years for me to finish one, so I'm going to try to finish a few before starting any more. That being said, I have two that should publish soon that are intended as one-off stories, Girl Crush and Dystopia, with the potential for a part two for each if there is interest.

I know some people have trouble finding things to write about, but with the real-life things I've actually done, combined with the things I'd still like to do, my problem is quite the opposite, as in focusing on the things I'd really like to write about. I of course assume that if these things excite me, they might be fun for somebody else to read too.

While I'm doing all that I'm also working on the retelling of Ken's Birthday Gift, and two others related to that. One is almost complete fiction and based on some very vivid daydreams that I had back then, and the other two are very close to the actual events without letting any of the unnamed players know that it's actually about them, should any of them read this one day. That's the problem with telling real stories, making sure the details aren't too specific, the descriptions aren't too exact.

So anyway, with all that being said, I have to have a proper conclusion for these characters, to do anything less would do them a disservice, so I will tell the rest of the story without rushing it. I was also on the fence to be honest about having my alter ego arrested by the sexy female cop, because I as well find that super sexy and hot, the power, loss of freedom and control, especially so very far from a known justice system, and perhaps even with Tammy's intervention. Since you think it's hot too, I'll do it, maybe live out that personal fantasy of mine vicariously through one of my characters.

Thank you again for your well thought out observations and motivations, Jackie.



Offline feline

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Re: Indecent Proposal by Jackie Rabbit
« Reply #34 on: August 11, 2022, 01:49:20 pm »
The wait for updates to your stories is frustrating, but having said that, quality takes time, and the thought and depth that goes into these parts is always very clear, and has always been a large part of the appeal for me :)  "sexy" is all well and good, but if the writing and the characters cannot get me to invest in the characters and their situation then it is only going to be shallow sexy.  Fun in passing, but not much more.

As for the arrest, yes, doing it because it is hot could easily lead you in a poor story direction.  On the surface there is no good reason for it to happen, based purely on Jackie's actions and behaviour on the island, but as an action orchestrated by Tammy, and for Tammy's benefit...  then something that seems wrong and out of place fits into the greater picture, making a greater whole :)

As always, looking forward to seeing more of your writing get posted ;D

Offline teanndaorsa

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Re: Indecent Proposal by Jackie Rabbit
« Reply #35 on: February 27, 2023, 02:22:09 pm »
Part 8 up tonight, enjoy!

Offline feline

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Re: Indecent Proposal by Jackie Rabbit
« Reply #36 on: February 28, 2023, 03:27:52 pm »
Yay, another update :)  Lets see what this has for us.  First thought is a bit of sadness at noticing the size of the scroll bar tells me this will be a shorter part.  Hopefully still well packed with lots of delightful fun though!

Jack is starting in with the taking, not asking, so I was a little surprised not to see an "angry" reaction to his "can't believe you are letting me do this" expression, since that isn't really the expression of the "me man, me take" husband that you are looking for at the moment, on this holiday.  Then it becomes clear why, you are distracted with other, rather more important thoughts!  And what a set of thoughts, especially if this really is the time!

It does beg the question of if there is a medical reason for the lack of pregnancy, and if so, on who's part?  It is so easy to assume that any issue lays with Mike, but that would simply be an assumption.  Still, it would fit with the shape of events, and it would give all of this one hell of a kick if Jack is able to impregnate her quickly and easily, during this holiday...

If Jack is suddenly a father to be then yes, the secret is likely to leak with time, but if you ended up moving on from Mike, and were living with Jack when the birth took place, then there really isn't much of anything for anyone to say or think, since everything will be "right and proper".  Although I do find myself thinking that what someone else will think about the fathers identity really does NOT matter, its not their life or marriage, so they can just piss off.  Its your life, your family, your two men, this is where the focus needs to be, and what needs to be resolved here.

Interesting how your focus has shifted so much from why you are here with this man, and what his boss is up to, to the pregnancy that you are now considering to be a done thing, and wondering if you should have planned / timed this better.  From memory it wasn't long ago that you suspected you would not even have sex again with Jack, unless he really managed to "man up" and "force" the issue.

A woman scorned...  then again, once your husband has lied to you, and trust has been broken, things are never going to go back to how they used to be, that's simply not how the world works.  So perhaps yes it is time to start focusing on moving forward.

Hard to define and hold on to...  perhaps just taking an overly simplistic approach here, but I am left with the feeling that keeping you chained to something very heavy would be a remarkably good approach to keeping hold of you!  Yes, you would need to be released on occasion, but I am sure the occasional "motivational" beating would help to keep your focus and priorities in the right place!  Yep, I am feeling so romantic, loving and soppy right now :)

Ah, people who are ill who want / need to see the baby, that adds a whole new type of pressure and urgency to everything!  I don't recall knowing that, but it certainly stirs my sympathies here.

An almost random aside, or is it, I recall seeing a TV program some years ago that reported on a scientific study on women going to night clubs, there was a direct corelation between their cycle and fertility and how much they wore, the more fertile they were the more skin they showed off when out for the night.  Not exactly what we have going on here, but an interesting parallel thought.

The fragility of the male ego strikes again.  But as I understand it, artificial insemination can place quite the strain on the female body, since eggs have to be harvested to impregnate, not exactly a minor and never notice it happened experience.

Given the obsession, and this does seem a reasonable term, that he has for you, having made you his office wife some time ago, its no surprise at all that he has been imagining and dreaming of sex with you now is it :)

Splutters and stairs at the screen it complete shock and confusion.  Yes...  I have just double checked, Jackie really has just said there is no current reason or justification for spanking you based on todays actions?!?!  In what possible world does this make sense?  Seriously, do you need the first 20 reasons to punish her, just based on today, off the top of my head?  There are always good and valid reasons!!!  I mean...  wearing clothes, taking clothes off, looking naughty, insighting lustful thoughts improperly...  Also don't worry, you can always appel if any of these reasons seem unreasonable...  to ME, and appealing is another reason to be punished!  It is good to be clear on these things though :)

See, blatantly confessing that she knows she is well over due for a spanking!  The description though, "how into spanking this NEW MAN OF MINE is"...  the switch has happened, now its just a matter of making it happen.

Seems that he is new to spanking "his woman", or else just being very careful and delicate, which would fit with what I remember seeing here.  As for who he is winding up, why not both of you?  Surely that is the best answer that we should be aiming for here!

*sigh* the idea that Mike's ego is so fragile that being told what his wife needs, by his wife, would have driven him off is really sad.  Without feedback and guidance how is anyone supposed to know what their partner really wants?  Magic?  It's not really a good answer for most after all *sigh*

Now that is a fun image to end on, but I do wonder, given how Jack is still being to gentle and sensitive for your desires and mood so much of the time, if he was really thinking about using gravity to help you get pregnant when bending you in half like that.  Maybe he just likes the rather obscene view it presents, and it is certainly a good example of finally stepping up and being more assertive with you.  Plus, he would get to spank your arse silly while actually watching your face when he returns...  which strikes me as a reasonable reason for this position *evil smirk*

Online jackierabbit1

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Re: Indecent Proposal by Jackie Rabbit
« Reply #37 on: March 02, 2023, 10:30:17 am »
Thank you Feline, I've been struggling for motivation lately. I have been working on and off on the retelling of Ken's birthday gift because of this, that story far easier to tell as there is very little fiction in that one. I have to be careful with dates and locations so that is the challenge, as is not identifying the real flesh and blood participants.

 Anyway, I had a dark thought as to this story; what if my namesake character was the one with the problem? What if Mike was the good guy here and sent his wife (who desperately wants to get knocked up) off with his best buddy to do the deed for him? What if the deal between both men was that "if you knock her up, you can have her." Maybe even Jack doesn't like the idea of being used as a simple stud service without the emotional attachment, and maybe this was his initial reluctance to copulate with Jackie?

I'm telling this story from Jackie's/my point of view, would I even realize how unreasonable and single focused obsessed I've become in search of motherhood? It's great, don't get me wrong, but the proper elements of a relationship should be there first, not some artificial timeline, even based on selfless need.

As far as the study about skin and fertility, oh yes, I'm sure it works like that for more than just me, without the hormonal moderation of the pill anyway. I've personally ridden that crazy train myself, both at Ken's cabin, and earlier on that first camping trip. I also think there is just something that men sense or smell, or in some way just know on a biological level; that this woman is ready to go and interested.

I've also done it when I was less than fully interested, and to say that my partner in that case had his work cut out for him would be an understatement. Not straight up refusal or anything, but there is a lot of ground between maybe and "oh yeah, I'm trying to hide how very into this I am at the moment." It's one thing to let a husband or serious boyfriend to see you that worked up, but quite another to let just anybody.

As far as the spanking, if it's playful and fun I'm up for that, and I agree that there really doesn't need to be a good excuse for doing so. That's something I grew into to be honest, but I'd be lying if I told you exactly when that happened. My SO gets them as playful discipline, and once to date not so playfully when he said something to me that he shouldn't have. I wasn't necessarily angry with him when I did it, but I didn't want a repeat either, so that one was just a bit more serious. He knew he was wrong, and he stripped and submitted to my authority the moment he walked through the door, and he even apologized afterwards; case closed and move on.

As far as being anchored in place and helpless, yeah! There is just something about that that almost always gets me going; helpless, struggling, do what you'd like to me.

Anyway, thank you for your comments, I'm actually trying to finish some of these longer stories and bring them to a proper conclusion, Jackie.

 

Offline feline

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Re: Indecent Proposal by Jackie Rabbit
« Reply #38 on: March 08, 2023, 05:23:02 pm »
You have several stories on the go, and writing is a fairly intensive process.  Hopefully you find the motivation, the joy and the delight in telling these stories :)

Finding out that Jackie was the reason for no pregnancy would certainly put a lot of events and feelings into a different light, but it wouldn't do anything for the long history of two men conspiring behind her back to, in a sense, share her.  Still, at this point, it is hard to argue that Jack is arguably the better long term man for her, at least from some points of view, since he seems well suited to become the dominant, demanding and commanding male presence that she responds well to, and enjoys being under and controlled by.

But we would need to actually reach that point.  She has become VERY invested in the thought of being pregnant right now, so if she hasn't just conceived how much pressure and damage is this going to do to her growing relationship with and connection with Jack?

Are you making the story a good bit more complex for good reasons here?  If you are struggling with motivation at the moment this may not be the best direction to take things, even as it is actually an interesting thought to consider and ask about :)

Online jackierabbit1

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Re: Indecent Proposal by Jackie Rabbit
« Reply #39 on: March 09, 2023, 10:44:53 am »
Since I'm telling this from Jackie's point of view I wanted her desperation to be "felt." She wants and needs this baby, but also needs a baby daddy too; the one goes with the other. She thought maybe her life was mostly complete and almost perfect before this vacation, but now we get to see the inner turmoil, which could be the real reason that she hasn't made any babies with her husband yet. I knew somebody like this once (in that particular case it was apparently the guys problem though) remove the turmoil and here come the kids. I don't know if nature works like this often, or if this was a very isolated incident though...

Anyway, I think it's also possible that Jackie wants a dominant man when she wants one, and something else when she doesn't, something many guys might have a problem with; switching from one mode to the other. Jack's concept of the perfect woman is one that can wear different proverbial hats depending on what room she's in and the time of day though; a chef in the kitchen, a needy submissive in the bedroom, an equal at work, so maybe they're perfect for each other.

I also think Jack's boss is convinced that something odd is going on, but maybe she doesn't know what it is yet. If Jackie has made a fool out of her there will be a price to pay, and if she has any power down in that tiny island nation Jackie could still see herself arrested and processed for some minor crime, and her proper identity then established. Imagine if there were several negative EPT's in the hotel waist paper basket, and then a positive one days later, establishing she came without, but got pregnant on her second honeymoon?

All well and good it that's your real husband, but if it's established that it's not, hard evidence of adultery, and maybe this little nation takes such things seriously. They most certainly don't want any sex on the beach, so sex on the beach with somebody other than your spouse would be especially bad.

I have a snarky chauvinistic scenario in my head; in it Jack and Jackie are caught in the act on the nude beach really going at it with wild passion, as in nobody else on the planet matters. Anyway, the sexy and ripped local cop on the quad catches them, arresting Jackie and cuffing her naked ass on the back of the quad to be driven into town, right down the main streets in the ultimate display. Everybody would be watching, and the cop would likely even make sure she got stopped in traffic along the way, or took the long way past their hotel.

Anyway, Jack, for his part in the "crime" would instead be respectfully issued a traffic-like ticket to be paid at the courthouse, for the equivalent of maybe ten dollars. Jackie's public punishment for her "crime" will be to be strung up as she was found and flogged symbolically by her husband, or other volunteers (paid or otherwise) for the privilege. Jack's boss comes to mind here, depending on how badly wronged she feels.

 In my mind I see this event as a well dressed cultural affair, kind of like the Kentucky Derby, with festive hats and mint julips for the watching ladies, and proper jackets for the men, all as Jackie is spread eagled between two massive trees with rusty old chains grown into the bark. It's a hundreds of years old tradition in this island nation, and it really cut down on the prostitution they once had. Brutality and excess fawning genteel culture, all in one scene.

Perhaps a second wedding follows the flogging festivities, a first anniversary do over if they had actually been properly married in the first place, but if done before the true first year anniversary of Jackie and Mike's annulling that legally and preventing Jackie from serving a lengthy jail sentence. Maybe instead the beach cops seek out good looking tourists for this treatment, as nothing more than a good excuse for a kinky party, and to maybe raise some money for charity.

What to do with Mike though? He seems a good guy, just maybe not the right guy for Jackie. Has he already come to this conclusion himself, and is he trying out something new and soft for himself while his wife is away?

Anyway, I kind of have the general story written in my head obviously, but would you change anything yourself?

I am genuinely interested in your thoughts here, Jackie. 

   

Offline feline

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Re: Indecent Proposal by Jackie Rabbit
« Reply #40 on: March 13, 2023, 02:12:54 pm »
First I have a dilemma...  do I want to shower you in flowers and chocolates to make this sex scene, arrest and punishment scene happen, or just handcuff you to the keyboard and flog you until you are done...  decisions decisions... I mean, the radically different and totally unfair treatment of Jackie vs the "naughty boy, behave" for Jack is so perfect and fit's with Jack's boss manipulating the situation to suit her own needs *teasing smirk*

Jack and to a degree here Jackie are both, almost by definition, looking for a fantasy partner rather than a real partner.  Jack wants the famous fantasy of a chef, maid and sex object, depending on the current room, while Jackie is starting to really come across as "I want a dominant when I want it, while I also expect to be respected and treated properly".  At least for Jackie these two sides are not automatically contradictory, as we have discussed and both know, but it is a tricky line to walk and balance to achieve.

Then again, perhaps there is something to be said for the "different woman in different rooms" approach here, since it actually does lean towards seeing and knowing to treat your "wife" differently depending on the situation.  But it would require Jack making this jump, starting to actually act on some of these instincts and obviously MAJOR lust / desire / infatuation towards Jackie.  He didn't get here, to this fairly messed up situation, without years of repressed desires...  Going from memory here, without double checking, but memory says that we have been told Jack has never really shown any evidence of dating, for quite some time now, so he is so focussed on Jackie that it has put other women out of his mind.  But to cross from fantasy to reality...

Jacks boss, really she comes across as someone who is going to respond VERY badly to feeling she has been made a fool of...  in some sense she clearly knows what is going on here, in that she knows that Jackie is legally someone else's wife.  A cheating wife is one thing, so pushing these two to "legally marry" on the island would be a very good "test", and when Jackie rejects the "simple" reconfirming of her vows it gives her all the ammunition she needs to either back Jack into a corner, to prove she was the "superior" person here...  or however she sees it playing out in the fall out.  But would she be prepared, even seriously consider that the "loving couple" would go through with the update of their vows?

I can see her being quite certain in her own mind, regardless of what her very talented and observant husband has told her that they would never go through with the wedding.  So when they do, and her house of cards collapses around her, she actually ends up where she originally wanted to be, with Jack set up as the ideal manager, with the perfect wife companion...  thinking cognitive dissonance goes full force, and she sees that she simply had to "force" Jack to man up and make real what he had always wanted, so she is suddenly the fairy godmother who stepped in and "saved" the correct marriage, and fixed everything!

The pregnancy...  I am thinking about the famous placebo effect, also how much stress can mess with the bodies hormones and reactions.  Perhaps it seems a stretch, but it seems quite reasonable in this setting for everyone to have been fertile, but a certain switch needing to be thrown in Jackie's head before her body was really ready and willing to become pregnant.  For her subconscious to have concluded some time ago that Jack was the man she really "needed" as the provider for her future child, simply ignoring and dismissing the marriage to Mike as meaningless, as Jack was considered the superior genetic father and provider.

Which brings us back to Mike, and how he ended up in this situation with the wedding rings and some grand secret that Jack isn't allowed / prepared to share...  I am wondering if, and rather hoping that you have a plan here :)  I am still not sure what was behind all of this, and left with the sort of plan of both men being "equally" eager in their pursuit of Jackie, while in reality Jack was more serious, but somehow unsure of himself, unwilling to go all in in pursuit of her, perhaps sensing that she preferred Mike, but having the financial backing to give her the ring and the wedding of her dreams...  but exacting a price and a promise of a possible second chance from Mike, in exchange for backing off and funding everything.  It seems odd, it needs some form of reason or motive to hang together.

Online jackierabbit1

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Re: Indecent Proposal by Jackie Rabbit
« Reply #41 on: March 14, 2023, 09:58:24 am »
The handcuff option sounds very promising to be honest. I have it written in my mind, I just have to write it...

Offline feline

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Re: Indecent Proposal by Jackie Rabbit
« Reply #42 on: March 20, 2023, 05:18:46 pm »
*looks out handcuffs and the HEAVY flogger* After all, if one is going to express one's delight in an authors work, they should do so properly!

 

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