Plaza Forum

Bondage => BoundStories Website Stories Feedback => Topic started by: teanndaorsa on February 01, 2025, 10:42:16 PM

Title: Dungeons and Dragons by thepinkbishop
Post by: teanndaorsa on February 01, 2025, 10:42:16 PM
You can view the story here on the plaza:

https://www.boundstories.net/storiesad/dungeons_and_dragons.html
F/f; bond; naked; collar; cuffs; gag; toys; vr; clamps; chain; rope; whip; pillory; cons; X

https://www.boundstories.net/storiesad/dungeons_and_dragons2.html
F/f; FF; M+/f; fantasy; vr; chastity; bond; chain; clamps; cuffs; gag; prison; susp; sex; mast; collar; pillory; pierce; cons; XX

https://www.boundstories.net/storiesad/dungeons_and_dragons3.html
F/f; majick; vr; game; fantasy; bond; rope; chastity; piercing; collar; costume; gag; mast; oral; cons; reluct; XX

Please feel free to leave your kind comments and feedback about this story here.

Thanks  ;)
Title: Re: Dungeons and Dragons by thepinkbishop
Post by: Geetwo on February 03, 2025, 09:29:06 PM
Very interesting concept with lots of possibilities. I liked it a lot. Thank you.
Title: Re: Dungeons and Dragons by thepinkbishop
Post by: fomuthenarwhal on February 06, 2025, 10:47:47 AM
Oh my god, it's pinkbishop.  I loved all your stories on gaggedutopia and I'm so glad to have found you again!!
Title: Re: Dungeons and Dragons by thepinkbishop
Post by: throwaway140124 on February 09, 2025, 02:21:51 PM
Great work so far - "super-realistic VR" is always a fun concept, and you've got an interesting cast of characters to explore it with. I'll be interested to see how Ellie continues to interact a) with Val and b) with this world given the difference between her irl presentation and her avatar's presentation.
Title: Re: Dungeons and Dragons by thepinkbishop
Post by: teanndaorsa on March 08, 2025, 09:48:39 PM
Part 2 up tonight, enjoy!
Title: Re: Dungeons and Dragons by thepinkbishop
Post by: nightgerbil on March 27, 2025, 08:55:26 PM
I love it. I'm really enjoying this vr rpg thing you got going. Hope it continues. If I could give any feedback I guess it'd be "more, I want more!" XD.
Title: Re: Dungeons and Dragons by thepinkbishop
Post by: thepinkbishop on April 03, 2025, 12:54:49 PM
Thanks for the feedback both here and via email. I've been wanting to write something like this for a while but wasn't quite sure how to tackle it. I'm glad I seem to have hit the mark. There is definitely more - twenty two more parts - so I hope I can keep everyone's interest.
tpb
Title: Re: Dungeons and Dragons by thepinkbishop
Post by: teanndaorsa on April 13, 2025, 07:20:43 PM
One more chapter up tonight, look forward to more!
Title: Re: Dungeons and Dragons by thepinkbishop
Post by: nightgerbil on April 21, 2025, 02:25:25 AM
oh good. glad to see more. One thing I'd say is it feels disjointed as a reader and a little unrewarding? I think inside a larger text this will work, jumping character to character like this but as it stands it doesn't bring any kind of closure for a reader. Like a middle chapter if you will. You cut off the two stories you were writing as they entered the find out phase. I think it might have been more rewarding for a reader to develop at least one story to a conclusion inside this chapter.

 Perhaps in a few months time if theres part 4,5,6,7 and 8 out there my critique will no longer be relevant, but for now its just left me feeling unsatisfied, like theres no "mini conclusion"?

 Fun twists with the worldbuilding, be interesting to see where you take the story next.
Title: Re: Dungeons and Dragons by thepinkbishop
Post by: thepinkbishop on April 21, 2025, 08:35:58 AM
Thanks for your comment. This is a fantasy novel. If it wasn't as long as Lord of the Rings nobody would take it seriously. It felt better for the site to serialise it in 10,000 word chunks (and fairer to the site editor) than to dump 260,000 words in one go.
I also quite like the idea of a cliffhanger. 
I'm glad you and others are enjoying the adventure and the setting. I've been wanting to write something like this for a while but it took some time to get it right.